RELEASING YOUR LINK OF JUDGMENT

Everyone is a critic.  The world is filled with them.  I have a question for you…

Are you one of them?

Did you not your head, YES?   

You should, because even if you have worked very hard at not being critical of others, “live and let live,”  “be and let be,” and you have done all of your wonderful footwork at being loving, giving, kind, respectful, and spiritual – you may have ignored one LINK of judgment.

What am I talking about?  The LINK of judgment you have toward yourself.

YOU are your own worst critic, probably more critical of yourself than you could ever find anywhere else.

Do any of these look familiar to you? 

• ·         Self-deprecating humor
• ·         Calling yourself “dumb” or “stupid”
• ·         Floundering in a pool of self-doubt
• ·         Nit-pick your flaws
• ·         Kick yourself for past mistakes and regrets
• ·         Perfectionistic tendencies
• ·         Overcompensation to your own detriment
• ·         Self-sabotage because you over-judge yourself.

Aren’t your own judgmental statements a mirror reflection for what you really feel about yourself internally? 

If none of these look glaring to you… could it be that you are too busy judging others to notice your own self-judgment or are you in denial?

Have you forgotten the loving gestures and sentiments you have received to self-apply?

Worse, have you forgotten the loving gestures and sentiments you can pay forward or are you too numb to even recognize you have the power to do this? 

If you have complained about anything or anyone in the last hour, day, or week... then you are still somehow sitting in judgment mode in some capacity.

While it is 'human' to have occasional gripes, it is important for humans to examine the core of where all "repetitive gripes" come from (particularly if they are in an endless loop). 

• Inability to cope/deal or dissect a problem to find a solution
• Frustration from only seeing things from one's own perception
• Lack of trust in possibility and opportunity for change (by one's own initiative)
• Fear of what is comfortable and known vs. taking the risk to change 

This usually applies when someone complains about their environment, their health, family, friends and co-workers.

Yet all of these things can be solved and have solutions for resolving conflict and change and would be better served without incessant judgment, and instead have the replacement of action and proactive efforts to create and initiate change. 

If you have judgment in your life, toward either yourself or others – you are bound to be entangled in a web of self-destruction rather than positive reinforcement construction.

If left untreated over time, self-judgment can be psychologically life crippling where you are unable to make decisions for yourself.   

Fear of judgment becomes the threat, paralyzing you from doing things because you are afraid to be judged by the very people you were judging.

Think about this for a moment, and you will begin to understand how this LINKS to procrastination.  

This is the difference between growing exponentially and remaining stuck.

Humans are somehow conditioned to believe there are limits within the parameters of their thinking. 

However, this is where I will show you how this belief alone can actually limit YOU from your own potential to expand and become open minded to the idea you can change your thoughts and your reality by subscribing to positivity.

When you eliminate judgment of others, this is the first step.

When you then eliminate your self-judgment, you are now daring to step into the arena of unlimited possibility for seeing how you can grow, change and then be a catalyst for change yourself… basically it is here you get out of your own way. 

So what can you do today to remove the LINK of judgment?  

One thing (more if you are so inclined)… it starts with one thing daily. 

Be aware, mindful, and conscious of your thoughts.  More so, be aware, mindful, and conscious with your actions toward others as much as you are to what you say to yourself on a daily basis.

Positive energy begins with you.  If wake up determined to have a good day and find the positivity within every day (even if it challenges you)…you can be grateful for getting through it.   

You can also look at every mini-milestone you have breaking bad habits, celebrating them bits at a time.

The more you do this; you are on your way toward eliminating cycles, which no longer serve you.  

Write something positive and tape it to the mirror where you have to look at it.  

Begin and end each day with this positive thought.  Soon you will change how you approach your day and how you conclude it with this energy transforming your own perception.

With changed perception, there is a shift in your being and no longer room for judgment to exist the more you do this.

Here you can begin living with positive vibrations to support your actions going forward and feel less burdened by the LINK of self-judgment or judgment of others.  You are now making room for better energy to serve your pure intentions to propel your energy into a positive direction.

Namaste.

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YOUR VITAL LINK TO YOUR IMMUNE SYSTEM HEALTH

So you think you have this whole wellness thing down, eh?

You eat healthy.  You exercise.  You even meditate. You get enough hydration and rest.

You wash your hands.  You may be a germophobe.  However, do you still get a cold/flu? 

Have you wondered WHY this is, even if you are extremely careful? 

While we are all conscious of our human getting the total exhaustion run-down and yes, we even are so on top of things we are in tune with pushing it or burning the candle at both ends and LISTEN, sometimes that is not enough.  First, let us check out my video first addressing the basic question of health and wellness from one of my self-proclaimed 

germophobe followers:

Now…  I am doing this blog so I can break this down even further to share a bit more detail on how to resolve this LINK connected to wellness.  

First, if you are doing all of the above, let me ask you these questions: 

• Are you FRUSTRATED?
• Are you WORRIED?
• Are you ANXIOUS?

• OR…perhaps you have resisted SPEAKING UP ABOUT SOMETHING THAT IS BOTHERING YOU?

Did you know THIS be the culprit of your getting sick all the time?

What?  YES.  Hang on… let me get to this. 

It starts with one little thing, if you are not being TRUE TO YOURSELF. 

Humans PROCRASTINATE on getting this done on a daily basis.  You put off having a conversation you need to have, or resolving a conflict or problem that needs to be handled.  Maybe you have lots of things piling up that you have put off getting to because you're 'too busy' - even if you pride yourself on being the healthy person who does everything right.

Inside of your heart, maybe you wanted to speak up or say something… maybe someone said something to you and it is bothering you because it is not sitting well.

Maybe you are kicking yourself for something you wish you had done differently, even if you think you've 'moved on.'  

If you HOLD IT INSIDE and let it, FESTER….  You are breaking down your immune system little by little.  Your quality of sleep (key word here, QUALITY) can be affected… and your blood pressure can rise, causing you to not be 100%. 

Fight or flight.  Your body knows and this is the response it goes to, to help you…. but at some point, you have to release it.

This is “internal anxiety” you may be holding onto in your mind can build.  When you “logically” make peace with it, this is NOT the total picture.  We humans can rationalize, justify, and try to convince ourselves of many things, however if it is not true to what the heart/gut knows, the body WILL REBEL.

Did you know if you have not released it from your HEART over time that this ‘rebellion’ can and will manifest disease within? 

You have heard of the phrase “Walk your talk.” 

Well, your mouth can SAY one thing, because your brain has told you “you’re fine."  

You say this 100 times a day to the question "How are you?"  "I'm fine..." you say, even if you are not.  

If your heart does not match and you have not aligned your mind and your heart truths, it will nag at you and nag at you from the inside.

What builds up?  Resentment or anger, fear, worry, and REGRET because you did not choose to be true to honoring what was not quite resonating with your well-being. Maybe you were trying to be “nice” or “accommodating” or too much of a team player or NOT rock the boat… to the point where it is a detriment to your own health.

Take a deeper look.  You will see this is true. 

Around some of the busiest times of the year, we push ourselves and push ourselves – we have a hard time saying NO to social invitations, which seem to pile up one after the other and we wear ourselves down, right?

When you say YES to everything, sometimes you may also put yourself in a situation where you compromise your time management, your stress management, your self-care or something else, even if you are doing all of the healthy things you think you need to be doing.

When we do this, we cannot LISTEN as effectively to our bodies to SLOW DOWN or STOP….so our bodies shut down for us to MAKE US REST to GET WELL when we humans get stubborn.

What can happen when you are too obsessive about your health is the same thing can happen, too.  You get paranoid and “overdo” something to the point you are internally exhausted, MISSING the CUES to speak up or stand up or SAY or DO what you need to do to be healthy.

Your mind rationalizes “Well, I’m doing everything right”….but if you tap into your heart and stop to listen to it, you will see that maybe you are missing that mind-heart link connection.  

Breathe.  You can get back on track.  We cannot ignore our mind-heart connection when it comes to our health.  This is why it is called mind, body, soul, and spirit health well-being.

YES… even when it comes to the common cold and flu.  

We as a society focus on the 'quick fix” syndrome of what we think we need to do to FIX or RESOLVE something in the interim.  

Nevertheless, even the best intention with exercising every day or eating right CANNOT SOLVE ALL.  The mind and the heart are POWERFUL TOOLS when it comes to WELLNESS.  We cannot ignore ONE vital LINK that seems to be overlooked and missed more often than not, because everyone seems to be fixated on the standard quick fixes, when it is not necessarily a FIX ALL, BE ALL SOLUTION.

So… if you are getting sick often even though you are doing what seems to be “all the right things” – check in with yourself in your mind and heart.  Ask yourself if you are holding onto something like something unsaid, a grudge or perhaps even a fear or paranoia that is actually causing unrest and making you feel less at ease than you should.  Maybe you agreed with something you shouldn’t have or are kicking yourself for a decision you made that you want to change, but haven’t done it yet.

I see you nodding… it is very common.  Many of us do not like to disappoint and agree to things to the point of overextending ourselves emotionally, or mentally which then can take its toll physically, later on. 

We can change the behavior of these actions with a simple tweak by slowing down enough to ask ourselves key questions.

Humans would rather be quiet more often than their hearts, minds or voices need to be because we like to keep the peace.  But if the peace inside you is “compromised” because your truth wants or needs to let something go, then it is time to let that go so you can get to your place of optimum health for your total well-being.  It is here we have a solid foundation to springboard from so the rest of our healthy diligence can take root and grow to maximize our healthy lifestyle from the inside out. 

Namaste.

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SEEING YOUR LINK OF MISUNDERSTANDING WITHIN CONFLICT

This morning, as I took out the trash, my neighbor was out on the sidewalk.  He had removed his cell phone from his ear to yell directly at it staring head on…

”What do you mean it is not a big deal?  It may not be a big deal to you, but it is a big deal to me!” 

While I have no idea what my neighbor was yelling about in context, or to whom - I do know that all humans have probably had this moment occur in their life at some point.

Whether he was yelling at his parents, a friend, his boss, his spouse, or his adult kids – I have no idea.

Whether he was yelling about something of his given away without his permission, being passed over for a promotion, forgotten plans, a betrayal of some sort, or a missed opportunity – I have no idea.

Nevertheless, whatever it was, it mattered to him.  There was a misunderstanding within conflict.

As I went back inside, I thought this was something worth addressing in a blog.  Like my neighbor, I am sure you have had a day in your life many times where …

• ·         Sometimes you felt misunderstood.
• ·         Sometimes you felt like no one is listening or you are not heard.
•       Sometimes you may have felt what mattered did not matter to anyone else.

Were you frustrated and angry?  Did you yell, as my neighbor did?

Or did you feel sad, disconnected, and isolated in your thoughts and existence?

Perhaps you felt rebellious, maybe you felt stuck or even hopeless.

It is natural and human to experience this – whatever your reaction may have been. 

We see all of this inside of arguments just as much as we hear it from the silent voices.

What?  Yes, it is true… not everyone is vocally reactive.  Some people stuff their feelings, suppress them, and do not use their voices causing dis-ease (!), illness, and stress. 

Others will create anxiety and panic; while others will choose aggressive action.

We see healthy humans – even if they are detached from their own ego, at times they will experience these feelings.

The ‘intensity’ of this disconnect or this misunderstanding and the severity of it penetrating your psyche depends heavily on the context, doesn’t it?  

However, there is a bigger a question.  Is your soul as concerned about this as your human?

Take a step back.  Look at that for just a moment.  

Human issues of principle and matter, value and connection rely upon caring.  Caring for the most part is a good thing… it means you stand for something, believe in something, attach your mind, and heart to something.

Although, most humans find conflict when the “something” they care about is…

• ·         Dismissed by someone else

• ·         Overridden by the priorities of other “somethings”

• ·         Not received as something that matters to someone else

• ·         Invisible/Non-existent

Humans fail in communication when feelings are tossed aside, grudges form, and unhealthy expectations are placed upon other humans to be mind readers if things are not articulated appropriately, clearly or in a timely fashion.  

Expectations are another culprit, as humans often point fingers of blame at other humans if said expectations are not met, when they were also not communicated from the get-go.  

Other conflicts arise when communication occurs, but the other person is not respected, listened to (and heard), received or understood. 

Misunderstanding is LINKED to MORE THAN ONE LINK in your life chain, particularly if you are not the best communicator.

Is it possible to tweak the energy you attach to the outcome of misunderstanding? 

We need to start with empathy, compassion, and comprehending the root of communication internally and externally: 

 https://linkronicity.blogspot.com/2016/03/the-empathy-link-within-internal-and.html

 

This is the core foundation of where you can start with yourself to understand how you communicate... and understand how others communicate.  

When we tackle both areas in expressing AND listening, it becomes a full circle exchange.

This exchange then has the power to be rooted in a meaningful and meaning FULL communication exchange.  

The result? 

• ·         Misunderstandings become fewer
• ·         Conflict can be resolved
• ·         Connection can begin with the right footing
•       Communication becomes a reciprocal exchange where there is a place to correct   misunderstanding for the sake of CLARITY

Being received and respected now has a home.  This is the foundation of where we need to address misunderstanding and conflict. 

Communication is a two way street.  Even the most articulate person can fail at communicating as much as the most open and receptive person can fail at fully comprehending another. 

What we need to establish is TRANSPARENCY of communication at every turn, asking about the context of the exchange to break through what the misunderstanding is about, and root emotions behind the upset at being misunderstood.

Most of the time, emotional upset and frustration never is about the specific conversation at hand, it is usually an accumulation of missed communications over time.

Read that again.

MISSED COMMUNICATIONS OVER TIME…. = miscommunication.

How we humans deal with conflict requires careful consideration for the explosive upset, examining further, many times when another person has not used their voice properly to clear up past misunderstandings, letting them build up to this point.

When we take the time to understand a misunderstanding carefully (literally WITH CARE) and thought, we get to the core matter of what is really being misunderstood and we are able to further dissect the conflict for ultimate clarity and comprehension.

It is arriving at this place; we can work through any situation.  It begins with honesty and truth, trust and authenticity, without fear or judgment.  If we add compassion and take a moment to note the REAL place of where any conflict comes from, we see the other human’s real connection to what matters most within every conversation.

So the next time you are taking out the trash, and you witness your neighbor yelling at the phone, remember... getting louder does not make things clearer. Only when we are clearer in communication do we turn up the volume of our voice truly being heard. 

Namaste.

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