When you were a child playing outside and told to get in the house –in your heart did you rebel even though you knew you had to get inside or you would be punished?
When you were in high school, told by your brothers or father to try out for the football team because they did, but your heart really wanted to play basketball – did you choose baseball or do what they wanted you to do to carry on the tradition?
At work, when you are in a group meeting where your co-workers are looking at going a certain direction with ideas, but you know in your gut there is a better solution – do you speak up?
Every single day whether you are a child, or a teen or an adult, we have choices in honoring our LINK to our INDEPENDENT SELF.
Most of the time, we look at consequences for honoring that LINK or shelving.
Sometimes shelving it is good in that we are respectful of others, we try to create peace to avoid conflict, and sometimes we shelve it to be a team player or to honor traditions.
However…. Sometimes shelving our independent LINK is bad when it becomes a detriment to our soul and who we are, what we desire and who we wish to become, because conformity is not always a healthy thing, if we are living our life anything other than our authentic selves. When this happens, we are not being true to who we are and if it goes on long enough, we end up living a lie in order to make everyone else happy except ourselves.
Although very small samples of this can be considered noble, in the end when we do not honor our INDEPENDENT SELF, we lose our identity and believe that in order to be accepted, we must be something we are not based on someone else’s ideal or measurement of what is acceptable.
The more we do this, we are creating examples of saying that this is ‘okay’ and then we only create a place where others fall into the same pit.
What we can do is embrace our own uniqueness – and in the same breath lovingly accept everyone’s differences…. Even celebrate them for being unique to all the other souls struggling to find acceptance both within themselves and with one another.
It all begins with us. For those who are brave enough to do it, they will learn to be comfortable as they are – but they need YOUR support just as much as you need support for who YOU ARE.
Speaking up to say “Hey, that’s not me” or “I prefer this XYZ kind of movie” or “I like this kind of food better” or “I don’t agree with your hardcore opinion, however I respect where you are coming from and can see your point” may not be the easy choice for your voice. Sometimes due to cultural, political, generational, or social class differences, there are things you may not fully understand. It is best not to be judgmental – but rather find freedom in your own being so that you can allow others to be free with theirs.
In the end, your honesty within yourself to your own truth and independent thoughts, feelings, actions and viewpoints can create peace within you if it is true to who you really are, rather than following the masses in trying to be accepted for your inauthentic thoughts, ideas or feelings that truly do not resonate with your soul.